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Ah, 30.

July 11, 2007

Just happened across a blog called Snippets of Life, in which the author was pondering the changes (or lack of) associated with turning 30. Thought I’d respond here… I’ve joked with some friends before and said I basically lost my mind from the time I turned 29 until about 32. That might be stretching it just a little, but I did go through some MAJOR life changes around that time, that I feel did start around my 29th birthday.

When I turned 29 I got my first tattoo. I do think it was motivated a bit by rebellion; I never went through a teenage rebellious stage growing up; I think it hit me very late in life. Over the next couple of years I found myself feeling more and more like I had settled into a role that just wasn’t me. I wasn’t necessarily unhappy, just discontent. I blamed a lot of it on turning 30 and tried to just ignore it but eventually the feeling was so much that I couldn’t sleep and I lost 15 pounds. It was then that I started realizing just how much it was interfering with my life, and decided to leave my husband, a few months before my 31st birthday.

That’s a very condensed version of the drama I was going through at the time, but I most definitely think it had something to do with the fact that it had hit me that I was 30, and I found myself constantly thinking “this is it?” So yeah, I think turning the big 3-0 can definitely have a huge impact. I’d advise anyone in their twenties to get their rebelliousness out of the way then instead of waiting until they get married or have more of a settled life. It was a big upheaval for everyone involved and I’ve only recently began to feel what it’s like to be somewhat “settled” again. Now, 5 years later, it’s actually an ok feeling.

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